//Breathe In and breathe Out// as the thought repeats “Insane World – In, Insane World – Out.”
Enough of this everyday mess! Some are created by peeps, some by overthinking, some by political leaders, some by misanthropic – cause rest is inevitable.
This inevitable part is something beyond our control such as inflation, wars, lay-offs, environmental issues, and pandemics. Since we all are together in this and none of us has any control over it. It’s better not to give a f*ck about them.
As Mark Manson says in his best-selling novel “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck.” “The key to a good life is not to give a fuck about more. It’s giving a fuck about less, giving a fuck about only what is true and immediate and important.” ― Mark Manson
Therefore, sane are not those who have 0 fucks to be given, but those who have important ones to deal with. Something we can drive the meaning in our life from. Something which keeps us sane in such an insane world and diverts our attention from the cluster of insanity.
So here comes this blog where we will understand how to give little and important fucks only. And how to tackle them. To become saner than ever.
Alright…! Now Breathe Again…….
Humanity is not Human anymore!
My heart was racing. My legs were throbbing under desperation to fly away somewhere none can watch me. Where I don’t have to face anyone. I was humiliated for the mistakes not done by me and I was reprimanded badly over it. The more I justify, the more stormy he gets. Like I was trying to keep things cool using the cold gasoline. I could have altercated but he was the senior and I was if you know you know.
This whole event had such a bad aftereffect on me that my whole day was spent in purgatory and the whole of humanity felt like dooming in the ocean of wrath and desire of animosity. The whole time I was trying to figure out why it was me every time.
Insanity is when you realize, you were treated the way you don’t deserve. When someone ill-treats you for no reason. Insanity is when someone passes a negative comment on you. When someone disrespects you for no reason just because they are higher in status or designation, more qualified, more powerful etcetera. And all of this just drives you insane.
When you have always been kind to others, compassionate, helpful, and empathetic – such events just tremble your trust in humanity. But things get more lethal when you overthink.
I too wanted to stop overthinking. I wanted to stay sane. But the more I tried to stop overthinking, the more it acted like a Ferris wheel in my head. The more I try to keep my sanity, I was acting insane.
Our insanity is a compound repercussion to remain sane in each circumstance.
You can’t control how they act!
“The chief task in life is simply this: to identify and separate matters. So that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control, and which have to do with the choices I actually control. Where then do I look for good and evil? Not to uncontrollable externals, but within myself to the choices that are my own…”
The one big lesson I have learned over the past year is that everyone is fighting their own battle in life. So it’s most of the time, not you who made them act the way they acted. They are just venting at you for reasons you aren’t even responsible for. And sometimes this makes you act harshly on other peeps too. Hence, this cycle goes on from one person to another. Like the transfer of energy from one source to another.
And this keeps on passing until you truly get aware of it and only wise people can do it. So let’s get wiser now.
Once you understand this the whole effect, self-blame gets vanished. Because at least you knew that it is not you all the time. But apart from that there is something the Greek philosophers command too:
You don’t control what happens, you control how you respond.
Marcus Aurelius
But that needs a lot of self-mastery on yourself to control your response as Victor Frankl says :
Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.
Victor Frankl
So once you find that narrow space between the stimulus and response you can alter your attitude and reaction towards other. For you must understand, your choices define you. If you made the same choice as some dumbass cynic then you both are on the same side against humanity.
Insanity is not caused by the external events, it is our own choice - we are our own evil.
(I’m totally sane!)Huh! what an insane world, such an insane world, much of insane world……!
There is a witch in my house!
But then all those little things which ghost-dance in your brain like some witch in a haunted derelict villa. These small pending things(such as electricity bill, house rent, EMI’s, Juicer mixer repair, car service, etc.) crumble in your head and weigh like a whole damn mountain causing headaches.
But then you realize that this headache is not the repercussion of the number of pending works but a lady in your goddamn villa – your so-called wife. Who has this habit of endlessly prattling about all those works. Then in continuation pointing out all your faults compared to the husbands of her chums. No sooner she started to curse herself for marrying you since you denied to accompany her at one out of twenty of the previous years’ cocktail parties. And then she ran into the whole house like a witch and throw some tantrums in a ghost-like voice and then one by one all the utensils were thrown on the floor giving neighbors hints about a cocktail party being carried out at your home without your invitation which made you more insane.
This all starts making you think that you are the most fat-headed husband of your fat-figured wife but are afraid to say the later.
All those pending work, wife tantrums, and boss dry-as-dust sarcasm compound enough to never let you stay sane among the uncontrolled causes.
So what’s the way and what can we do to keep us sane in this insane world.
The road toward Sanity!
In many other blogs, you will get numerous pieces of advice to remain sane in this insane world- I have mentioned links for some of such blogs at the end of this blog (advises such as walking in nature, do socialize, cutting off negative news, meditating, start journal, Gratitude, Doing yoga/Exercise, Reading, avoiding overthinking, and on and on).
I too do believe in such ways of living cause that’s really helpful. But that’s what is already known to most of us. One thing that everyone misses to talk about, is something that I want to bring right next to your notice in this blog.
Being Productive is a Hack!
This section talks about how to not let the little things take charge of you. How you can one by one finish such small things and cease them from compounding. How you can clear off your desk, and your to-do list, and attend every event with your witch-cum-wife.
The point isn’t to let the circumstances control you but that you control the circumstances. Give up the giving-up attitude and the procrastination. If it takes less than a minute to do then just do it(1-minute rule).
We often left things for tomorrow, we procrastinate and when tomorrow comes we find ourselves in the same situation again until it becomes the whole week then a month and so on.
The point is we do not organize our tasks properly. We don’t plan cause we don’t understand the seriousness until it’s really a do-or-die situation. The so-called “end effect”.
It’s not about the difficulty of work. We just don’t get along with being productive. If you just try to be a little productive, you can at least finish little things in your daily life and stop them from compounding, if not the bigger projects (though we will talk about that too in coming productivity blogs).
The Zeigarnik Effect!
Psychologists have bought us some exciting concepts. The one I wanna put the lights on is “THE ZEIGARNIK EFFECT“. This explains why uncompleted tasks pop back into our consciousness. Psychologists reveal our brain is wired to nag us about pending work. A kind of reminder that tells us to finish our task which only stops when we close out on our deals.
The point is the task can be as small as getting up and switching off the phone charger but the reminder is as intense as you get when you forget to pick your wife from the supermarket while returning home after work and now you are afraid of the deadly repercussion that your witch(oops, I mean wife) is gonna throw at you after returning home via cab.
The point is that such endless reminders can be undone. If we finish that little task as soon as we get it. We can rid of a huge number of reminders and eventually can stay sane. Since insanity is not caused by a single reason. It’s a compounded effect of numerous causes holding on for a longer period of time. Moreover, by finishing such small tasks and being productive together we not only can stay sane but the huge surge in the confidence level of an individual is also seen by the scientist.
If it takes less than a minute to plan and not more than 10 minutes to execute, then just do it and remain on the top of the table. You either let it go from your list or get set go to finish it.
And thus life goes on along with numerous problems collected one by one. And there we are, daring to face them all at once.
Zero fucks given!
If there is a skill worth learning in life then it is the art of knowing what is worth ignoring. Since your attention is limited so it’s better to invest it in the things worth working for, things you can control. And it’s always better not to stress about the things beyond your control which eventually solves 80% of your unnecessary trouble.
Stoics talk a lot about it and I’m a big follower of it. I try to idealize its concept but most of the time among life hustle I frail and fail a lot. But then I get up. Give myself sometime whenever I’m fucking stressed out or gets insane. I find time to talk to myself. Time to write because that puts resistance over my thinking. I plan and then act. I face my fear one by one.
In most cases, things I am insane about are not the actual reason for my insanity and that clarity only comes when I meditate, when I sit down in silence away from this insane world. Sometimes I do talk to my loved ones my elder ones whom I think can help. Because seeking help is a good option but most of us are just afraid of it. And above all, I try to be a human being. Read our blog are you a human being?
Furthermore, things like Inflation, Politics, Talks about World War, Pandemics, Crime rates, others back-biting, and Environmental crisis are something we as an individual can’t do anything about. Then why worry about it? This means we have already eliminated such issues from our brain-list since they are beyond our control. And thus the only thing that remains is something we can do about.
POST SCRIPT
People often get worried about the things they can control, lets say their promotions, their exams, and their presentations in board meetings. And my reply remains always the same as Lord Krishna in Bhagavad Gita advises Arjuna “give up the concern for the results and instead focus on the effort only”.
If you have done enough of your hard work on a particular and if you know that you really give it your best then why does the result really matters to you?!!
Moreover, Insanity is nothing but a coping mechanism playing at its extreme because of self-denial. Thence, do not avoid insanity instead take it as a reminder that something is the sine qua non (essential to giving attention to). Identify that, talk about that, practice self-compassion(if you are at fault), and take action to solve it asap.
This is more than enough to keep you sane in this gonnabe insane world.
Finally, a huge-sane hug to you all!
Adios…!
Mentioned below are the links of other best blogs available. These are also the top 2 which i loved the most:
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